000030
Posted By: Daniel (#7693)
Date/Time: Mon Dec 21 00:06:25 2009
Subject: Holiday Cheer!

"Rumor has it that the meal just blew up in their faces! Yet another reason to keep the kids from playing in the kitchen with the Cook-bot 9000, eh Thomas?" the bleach-blonde news anchor on the left said to the man sitting next to her… sounding more like Toe-Moss than Thomas. "That's Right, Susan," Soohs-hen, not the normal Susan. "Now that's what I call, a Sticky Situation!"

The camera switches to a close-up of Tom, and he turns to it. "In other news, Christmas is only a few days away, and where better to get in your last minute shopping than at the Cherry Creek Mall?" The camera displays a giant mall-plex building, a least ten-stories in height, and then zooms in rapidly to a giant castle display in the center of the mall, surrounded by escalators and elevators. At the center of the castle is a very fat man, in a red suit.

"Especially with the giant Santa setup in the children's center, with a special broadcaster that sends the child's wishes strait from the Jolly-old free spirit back to his workshop at the North Pole!" Queue special effects, of a broadcast wave emanating from the Santa display, 'past' the parents wandering the mall, and off to the North Pole.

"Now we take you, live into the field with reporter, Ihaduhbaybee Eets'aboi. Ihaduh?" Camera changes to a dark-haired Amerind reporter, dressed outlandishly festively. A Ruthenium shirt displays a house with a sled pulled by reindeer landing, and then taking off into the night… only for them to come and land on the roof again… the words 'Ho Ho Ho' blinking in the starry night… Santa Hat on her head… the works.

"Thanks, Denise. Here at the Cherry Creek Mall, the holidays are going great. Children are happily chatting away with the Jolly-Old free spirit, parents are running around doing their last minute shopping…" Behind the reporter, a pair of happy-looking, corporate drones are walking towards the children's center, a big-honkin' gift box(tm) in hand, wrapped in green, with a red ribbon.

"The Holiday cheer is at a peak, and business is just booming-" Of course. She just /had/ to say those words. Because no sooner does she say it, that the box the couple behind her EXPLODES. The mall bursts into Chaos, and when the brief bit of static clears from the image, the camera is pointing strait up. Screams, Alarms, dogs and cats living together, people running around past the camera.

A bloody hand that looks strikingly similar to the reporters fumbles over the lens, making it red and blurry, and then static replaces it… and the scene cuts out to a blank screen, with Technical Difficulties, Please stand by scrolling across it.

(I'm sure I'm going to regret this, but… @mail Daniel for legwork.)

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